Independence Day Quiz

"The 4th of July is the time when we celebrate our nation-- a time to reflect on the freedoms which we believe are not granted by our government, but are self-evident rights for all humankind. Time for the Independence Day Quiz which asks, 'How much do you really know?'"

Good luck!

Class Today at NoBullU on WEBY

Listen to the voice of wisdom and reason in a wilderness of partisan rhetoric -- No political insanity, no conservative hypocrisy, no liberal foolishness -- Just straight talk, straight at you, and that’s no bull!!

NoBullU will broadcast today from 4:05 to 6:00 p.m. at 1330 AM WEBY and on line.

Topics:

Local Business Shout-Out: TBD.


Follow-up to fact-free fantasies: don't be duped by the Birthers, including our very own Pastor Dred Scott (you may remember the infamous Dred Scott decision of 1857, which asserted that African Americans were "beings of an inferior order" who "had no rights which the white man was bound to respect." That ruling declared that African Americans could never be U.S. citizens and therefore could never be President), who does the devil's work and supports Middle East dictators, he also cites the Bible for his sexist beliefs, I suppose he supports slavery;


Local and regional: Garcon Point bankruptcy, and fair winds and following seas to Mark O'Brien;


National and international: I'm waiting, where's the balanced budget, don't hold you breath because the Republi-CONs Con the Tea Party, there'll be no $100 billion budget cut, and let's admit the obvious, the Republi-CONs are not serious about deficits, and remember, we went from surplus to debt, Republi-CON style,

Phoney deficit hawks

Call the Republi-CON bluff on the debt and the deficit,

Is the debt ceiling constitutional?,

Name that Florida Republi-CON,

Another Republi-CON tax myth bites the dust,

Pining for laissez-faire land, move to China, where, "[o]ver the past two and a half years, thousands of workers, villagers and children have been found to be suffering from toxic levels of lead exposure",

Still seeking "a country with low taxes, little regulation and traditional family values, I have the perfect place for them. Body armor suggested",

Who is your favorite 2012 GOP candidate, or do you have a favorite not-yet-a-candidate?, or none of the above,

Republi-CONs and their fantasy economic plans,

Keep America great: spend, cut, tax and invest, and stop Chinese trade cheating,

Just 113 days til the new and improved judgment day, again,

Racial and gender desegregation, equal opportunity for working-class families, single-payer universal health care, excellent child care and educational opportunity, and salaries that limit income inequality. Name that beloved American socialist organization,

Health care lawsuit update,

Big brother is watching you,

and 'The Great Stagnation' and our broken political system;


Fun stuff: questions a dog might ask God, did you ever wonder . . ., the liquid nitrogen burger, paraprosdokians, the Y Generation, Husband Day Care, and cute little cats in 'It Could Be Worse';

and

Donate to a good cause: help the friends of a former instructor at the Naval EOD school at Eglin Air Force Base, Gunnery Sgt. John Hayes, who was detachment company gunnery sergeant from June 2007 to June 2010 and taught several courses and was recently wounded in Afghanistan.

I'll discuss anything, but expect a no mercy take down if you are a shrieking hatemonger of right-wing rhetoric and partisan hackery, pandering to fear, anger and hatred, because the truth sure makes it hard out there for the party pimps.

So tune-in, call-in, but only if you can handle the truth and some ass kickin' discussion of politics and current events.

Phoney Deficit Hawks

The debt ceiling has been raised 70 times during the last 60 years. How many times did Reagan raise the debt ceiling?

Health Questions

From email:

1. If walking/cycling is good for your health, the postman would be immortal.

2. A whale swims all day, only eats fish, drinks water and is fat.

3. A rabbit runs and hops and only lives 15 years.

4. A tortoise doesn't run, does nothing ..yet lives for 450 years.

Name That Florida Republi-CON

He "describes himself as a fiscal conservative, arguing that 'all taxpayer-funded infrastructure projects must be wise investments.' But he has pulled strings in Washington to get special consideration for [this pet] project. . . [spending] years badgering federal agencies, bullying state officials, blocking Amtrak naysayers and trying to bypass federal restrictions to build support and squash opposition to the commuter line."

However, this " 61-mile commuter rail project . . . ranks as one of the least cost-effective mass transit efforts in the nation.

With a price tag of $1.2 billion at completion, the rail line is expected to serve just 2,150 commuters a day when it starts operating in three years. It will not link to the Orlando airport or Disney World, among the region’s biggest traffic generators. Florida’s governor is even considering killing the project, worried that local government officials will rebel if they have to cover any shortfalls at the fare box.

But the so-called SunRail project has survived, at least so far, a testament to the ability of one congressman to help push through hundreds of millions of dollars in federal spending, even at a time of deep concern over ballooning federal deficits.

[He is] "chairman of the House Transportation and Infrastructure Committee, has spent years badgering federal agencies, bullying state officials, blocking Amtrak naysayers and trying to bypass federal restrictions to build support and squash opposition to the commuter line. . .

But skeptics question whether [his] real goal is to give a taxpayer-financed gift to CSX, the freight rail giant and a generous Mica campaign donor, which would get $432 million for its tracks and for upgrades to tracks it owns elsewhere in the state."

Read The New York Times, A Congressman’s Pet Project; a Railroad’s Boon.

Fishing vs Fornicating

From an email:

No matter how much whiskey you've had, you can still Fish.

You don't have to hide your Fishing magazines.

It is perfectly acceptable to pay a professional to Fish with you once in a while.

The Ten Commandments don't say anything against Fishing.

If your partner takes pictures or videotapes of you Fishing, you don't have to worry about them showing up on the Internet if you become famous.

Your Fishing partner doesn't get upset about people you fished with long ago.

It's perfectly respectable to Fish with a total stranger.

When you see a really good Fishing person, you don't have to feel guilty about imagining the two of you Fishing together.

If your regular Fishing partner isn't available, he/she won't object if you Fish with someone else.

Nobody will ever tell you that you will go blind if you Fish by yourself.

When dealing with a Fishing pro, you never have to wonder if they are really an undercover cop.

You don't have to go to a sleazy shop in a seedy neighborhood to buy Fishing stuff.

You can have a Fishing calendar on your wall at the office, tell Fishing jokes, and invite coworkers to Fish with you without getting sued for Fishing harassment.

There are no Fishing-transmitted diseases.

If you want to watch Fishing on television, you don't have to subscribe to the Playboy channel.

Nobody expects you to Fish with the same partner for the rest of your life.

Nobody expects you to give up Fishing if your partner loses interest in it.

You don't have to be a newlywed to plan a vacation primarily to enjoy your favorite activity.

Your Fishing partner will never say, "Not again? We just Fished last week! Is Fishing all you ever think about?"

Another Republi-CON Myth Bites the Dust

"[W]hat we’ve seen over the past 30 years is that lower marginal tax rates have not led to particularly impressive economic growth, labor markets or revenues. Growth was actually more impressive back when marginal tax rates were higher." Read the Washington Post, Tax rates and economic growth in one graph.

Hedgehog News is 'the New England Patriots of Lying'

The Daily Show
Tags: Daily Show Full Episodes,Political Humor & Satire Blog,The Daily Show on Facebook

Class Today at NoBullU on WEBY

Listen to the voice of wisdom and reason in a wilderness of partisan rhetoric -- No political insanity, no conservative hypocrisy, no liberal foolishness -- Just straight talk, straight at you, and that’s no bull!!

NoBullU will broadcast today from 4:05 to 6:00 p.m. at 1330 AM WEBY and on line.

Topics:

Local Business Shout-Out: TBD.


Follow-up to fact-free fantasies: don't be duped by the Birthers, including our very own racist pastor, who does the devil's work and supports Middle East dictators;


Local and regional: another article about FL State Sen. Greg Evers, and his corporate overlords in the billboard industry, and another proposal to ban booze at the beach, and fair winds and following seas to Mark O'Brien;


National and international: I'm waiting, where's the balanced budget, don't hold you breath because the Republi-CONs Con the Tea Party, there'll be no $100 billion budget cut, and let's admit the obvious, the Republi-CONs are not serious about deficits, and remember, we went from surplus to debt, Republi-CON style,

Call the Republi-CON bluff on the debt and the deficit,

Pining for laissez-faire land, move to China, where, "[o]ver the past two and a half years, thousands of workers, villagers and children have been found to be suffering from toxic levels of lead exposure",

Still seeking "a country with low taxes, little regulation and traditional family values, I have the perfect place for them. Body armor suggested",

Who is your favorite 2012 GOP candidate, or do you have a favorite not-yet-a-candidate?,

Republi-CONs and their fantasy economic plans,

Keep America great: spend, cut, tax and invest, and stop Chinese trade cheating,

My virtual strip search, the terrorist is dead, but will he still win thanks to the Republi-CONs?

For Mom and Pop Tammy, a world without chain stores,

Just 120 days til the new and improved judgment day, again,

Speaking of judgment day, Republi-CON religious hypocrisy

Racial and gender desegregation, equal opportunity for working-class families, single-payer universal health care, excellent child care and educational opportunity, and salaries that limit income inequality. Name that beloved American socialist organization,

The Middle East mess and the hope for democracy, and Christians and Muslims clashing in Egypt, Syria attempting to crush its democracy rebellion and Palestinians climbing over fences into Israel — the best we can do now is manage the unavoidable and avoid the unmanageable, time for a serious peace policy combined with a serious energy policy, and he may be dead, but will he still win thanks to the Republi-CONs?,

So you don't believe in global warming, then explain what happens to 35 gigatons of CO2 each year,

The health care industry bottom-line, the reason Republi-con want to repeal the new health care law, the nation’s bloated annual health-care tab would swell by more than $4 billion" after a company raised the price of a medicine from $20 to $1,500 per dose, and bad news for health care law opponents,

and 'The Great Stagnation' and our broken political system;


Fun stuff: questions a dog might ask God, did you ever wonder . . ., the liquid nitrogen burger, paraprosdokians, the Y Generation, Husband Day Care, and cute little cats in 'It Could Be Worse';

and

Donate to a good cause: help the friends of a former instructor at the Naval EOD school at Eglin Air Force Base, Gunnery Sgt. John Hayes, who was detachment company gunnery sergeant from June 2007 to June 2010 and taught several courses and was recently wounded in Afghanistan.

I'll discuss anything, but expect a no mercy take down if you are a shrieking hatemonger of right-wing rhetoric and partisan hackery, pandering to fear, anger and hatred, because the truth sure makes it hard out there for the party pimps.

So tune-in, call-in, but only if you can handle the truth and some ass kickin' discussion of politics and current events.

Keep America Great: Stop Chinese Trade Cheating

"China uses unfair trade practices to wage war on our manufacturing base, [and] the American economy is the big loser." Read the Los Angles Times, How China unfairly bests the U.S.

Keep America Great: Spend, Cut, Tax and Invest

Where is the "candidate who could run in 2012 and deliver the shock therapy to the corrupt, encrusted, two-party duopoly now running the show in America.

Such a Third Party would have a simple agenda: 1) Inject a short-term stimulus. 2) Enact Simpson-Bowles. 3) Shrink our presence in Afghanistan. 4) Raise automobile mileage standards. 5) Impose a gasoline tax to pay for a massive increase in government-supported scientific research and a carbon tax to pay for new infrastructure and stimulate clean-power innovation."

Read The New York Times, 100 Days.

Humor to Make You Smile

From an email:

1. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.

2. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.

3. I work hard because millions on welfare depend on me!

4. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.

5. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

6. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.

7. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

8. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

9. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

10. I'm not a complete idiot -- some parts are missing.

11. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

12. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine.

13. God must love stupid people; He made so many.

14. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.

15. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

16. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

17. Being "over the hill" is much better than being under it!

18. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.

19. Procrastinate Now!

20. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That?

21. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

22. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.

23. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!

24. They call it PMS because MadCow Disease was already taken.

25. He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead.

26. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.

27. Ham and eggs. A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.

28. The trouble with life is there's no background music.

29. The original point and click interface was a Smith and Wesson.

30. I smile! because I don't know what the hell is going on.

Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.

Republi-CON Religious Hypocrisy

"Whether the topic is hair length, celibacy, when life begins, or divorce, time and again, the leaders most opposed to gay marriage have demonstrated an incredible willingness to consider nuances and complicating considerations when their own interests are at stake." Read CNN, Bible condemns a lot, so why focus on homosexuality?


More proof that you don’t need to base opinions and decisions on sentences taken "at random from a 400-year-old English translation of a group of ten tangentially related Middle Eastern texts transcribed from Greek, Hebrew, and Aramaic oral histories".

Did You Ever Wonder . . .

From an email:

Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety-one?

If 4 out of 5 people suffer from diarrhea... does that mean that one out of five enjoys it?

Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with?

If people from Poland are called Poles, then why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?

Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a racecar is not called a racist?

If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, then doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?

If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP? ?

Do Lipton Tea employees take 'coffee breaks?'

What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks, so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use. Toothpicks?

Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen can look for them while they deliver the mail?

Is it true that you never really learn to swear until you learn to drive?

If a cow laughed, would milk come out of her nose?

Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?

Did you ever notice: When you put the two words 'The ' and 'IRS' together, it spells 'THEIRS'?

Questions a Dog Might Ask God

From an email:

Dear God: Is it on purpose our names are the same, only reversed?

Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom smell one another?

Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story?

Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a Dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the 'Chrysler Eagle' the 'Chrysler Beagle'?

Dear God: If a Dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad Dog?

Dear God: We Dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?

Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.

Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?

Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a good Dog.
1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up.
2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.
3. The Litter Box is not a cookie jar.
4. The sofa is not a 'face towel'.
5. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.
6. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.
7. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of saying 'hello'.
8. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table
9. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house - not after.
10. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt across the carpet.
11. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch.
12. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.

P.S. Dear God: When I get to Heaven may I have my testicles back?

Cheer Up Monday

This Too Shall Pass - Rube Goldberg Machine version:

A Short Love Story

From an email:

A man and a woman who had never met before, but who were both married to other people, found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a trans-continental train.

Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were both very tired and fell asleep quickly, he in the upper berth and she in the lower.

At 1:00 AM, the man leaned down and gently woke the woman saying, 'Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold.'

'I have a better idea,' she replied 'Just for tonight, let's pretend that we're married.'

'Wow! That's a great idea!', he exclaimed.

'Good,' she replied. 'Get your own damn blanket.'

After a moment of silence, he farted.

Class Today at NoBullU on WEBY

Listen to the voice of wisdom and reason in a wilderness of partisan rhetoric -- No political insanity, no conservative hypocrisy, no liberal foolishness -- Just straight talk, straight at you, and that’s no bull!!

NoBullU will broadcast today from 4:05 to 6:00 p.m. at 1330 AM WEBY and on line.

Topics:

Local Business Shout-Out: TBD.


Follow-up to fact-free fantasies: don't be duped by the Birthers, and why do Republi-CONs lie?, it explains our Friday sycophants, but why do they still do the Devil's Work and Supporting Middle East Dictators;


Local and regional: TBD;


National and international: I'm waiting, where's the balanced budget, don't hold you breath because the Republi-CONs Con the Tea Party, there'll be no $100 billion budget cut, and let's admit the obvious, the Republi-CONs are not serious about deficits, and remember, we went from surplus to debt, Republi-CON style,

Damn middle class jobs, Republi-CON Polly wants a tax cut

Call the Republi-CON bluff on the debt and the deficit,

Pining for laissez-faire land, move to China, where, "[o]ver the past two and a half years, thousands of workers, villagers and children have been found to be suffering from toxic levels of lead exposure",

Still seeking "a country with low taxes, little regulation and traditional family values, I have the perfect place for them. Body armor suggested",

After the CNN candidate special, who is your favorite 2012 GOP candidate, or do you have a favorite not-yet-a-candidate?,

Republi-CONs and their fantasy economic plans,

Is the real Weiner story really about narcissism, or men in politics? (Female politicians rarely get caught up in sex scandals. Women in elective office have not, for instance, blubbered about Argentine soulmates (see: Sanford, Mark); been captured on federal wiretaps arranging to meet high-priced call girls (Spitzer, Eliot); resigned in disgrace after their parents paid $96,000 to a paramour’s spouse (Ensign, John); or, as in the case of Mr. Weiner, blasted lewd self-portraits into cyberspace.)

Colbert explains how "Weiner's sadly delicious sordid saga proves that Democrats don't share Republican values . . . at least Republican Chris Lee was trying to get some action. Republican politician are man enough to hit that thing Ensign, Vitter, even when it is a gay scandal, they're not tweeting love letters, they're tearing up an airport bath rooms until someone calls the cops",

And Sarah's family vacation, where you can also watch Palin strings together "random string of words" to explain history and Colbert helps prove "that Paul Revere could have ridden a horse while ringing a bell and firing multiple warning shots from a front-loading musket",

My virtual strip search, the terrorist is dead, but will he still win thanks to the Republi-CONs?

Just 127 days til the new and improved judgment day, again,

Racial and gender desegregation, equal opportunity for working-class families, single-payer universal health care, excellent child care and educational opportunity, and salaries that limit income inequality. Name that belove American socialist organization,

The Middle East mess and the hope for democracy, and Christians and Muslims clashing in Egypt, Syria attempting to crush its democracy rebellion and Palestinians climbing over fences into Israel — the best we can do now is manage the unavoidable and avoid the unmanageable, time for a serious peace policy combined with a serious energy policy, and he may be dead, but will he still win thanks to the Republi-CONs?,

So you don't believe in global warming, then explain what happens to 35 gigatons of CO2 each year,

The health care industry bottom-line, the reason Republi-con want to repeal the new health care law, the nation’s bloated annual health-care tab would swell by more than $4 billion" after a company raised the price of a medicine from $20 to $1,500 per dose, and bad news for health care law opponents,

and 'The Great Stagnation' and our broken political system;


Fun stuff: the liquid nitrogen burger, paraprosdokians, the Y Generation, Husband Day Care, and cute little cats in 'It Could Be Worse';

and

Donate to a good cause: help the friends of a former instructor at the Naval EOD school at Eglin Air Force Base, Gunnery Sgt. John Hayes, who was detachment company gunnery sergeant from June 2007 to June 2010 and taught several courses and was recently wounded in Afghanistan.

I'll discuss anything, but expect a no mercy take down if you are a shrieking hatemonger of right-wing rhetoric and partisan hackery, pandering to fear, anger and hatred, because the truth sure makes it hard out there for the party pimps.

So tune-in, call-in, but only if you can handle the truth and some ass kickin' discussion of politics and current events.

Paraprosdokian

From an email: The term means a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently used in a humorous situation. For example: "Where there's a will, I want to be in it," is a type of paraprosdokian.

Ok, so now enjoy:

1. Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.

3. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

4. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.

5. We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.

6. War does not determine who is right - only who is left.

7. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

8. Evening news is where they begin with 'Good Evening,' and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

9. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

10. A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station.

11. I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted paychecks.

12. Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says, 'In case of emergency, notify:' I put 'DOCTOR.'

13. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

14. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

15. Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.

16. A clear conscience is the sign of a fuzzy memory.

17. I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

18. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

19. Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.

20. There's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can't get away.

21. I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.

22. You're never too old to learn something stupid.

23. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

24. Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

25. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

26. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

27. A diplomat is someone who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you look forward to the trip.

28. Hospitality is making your guests feel at home even when you wish they were.

29. I always take life with a grain of salt. Plus a slice of lemon, and a shot of tequila.

30. When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.

Why Do Republi-CONs Lie?

Because, "bias, lack of logic and other [irrational] flaws that pollute the stream of reason are . . . social adaptations that enable one group to persuade (and defeat) another. Certitude works, however sharply it may depart from the truth. . . Truth and accuracy [are] beside the point." Read The New york Times, Reason Seen More as Weapon Than Path to Truth.

This explains why it is a complete waste of time to argue with a Republi-con.